Remember back in the stone age when the pioneers of music would record things to tape, press it to vinyl and then you’d listen to it through a tube amplifier and speakers that cost more than $50? How archaic! Well people are trying to tell us that the quality of music has been lost on the consumer. That today’s kids have NO IDEA what a good record sounds like. Assholes. Go eat some shit and listen to the newest record on Victory that was recorded digitally without a console on ProTools and then ripped off of the CD into glorious 128 kbps MP3 format, placed into your iPod and then blasted through your car’s incredible sound system using an FM transmitter. Fuck bottom end! Man, I sit back listening to my ear buds, soaking up the tinny sounds of today’s finest rock and I think to myself “This is it. Music never sounded finer”.

So starting today I am ONLY listening to music in MP3 format. No CDs. No vinyl. Just MP3. I’m destroying all of of my old Beatles records. Those guys were assholes. I’m going to urinate on a 2 inch tape machine. This is a revolution, man. We are the new audiophiles. If I want “warmth” or “depth” in the sound of my music I will simply light my Zune on fire or listen to it under water.

I will also only be listening to digital singles from now on. I will explain more about that later. Oh! People who buy books are stupid. That will be another blog.